ACT 1 - SCENE 4
INTERIOR, BASE NEW VEGAS, MARSMARSOVICH
And I tell you that there is irrefutable proof that constructive co-habitation has immense value for both parties, not just for male of
species, but female of species too! No matter what you think! You think too much. That is
(A diplomatic party is in progress. Terrance is standing with a small group of scientists, two of whom
are in a heated argument.)
Marsovich, you are problem! What do you mean, 'no matter what
I think'? I am only one of us who does think! The science of Co-habitation?
You mean live together! That would suit you fine! You are male
Venuski, Marsovich... Now come on you two; always talking science.
This is a party remember? (he turns to those watching the argument and
raises his glass) Smiles!... smiles everyone!
(Suddenly Terrance seems to melt into a sitting position on the floor and then lean over on his side. Two other guests join him in that position. From the party guests, a festive cheer of "Gatsby!" and much laughter, accompanies their slow recline to the floor. The "sleeping" guests are helped to their feet amid loud requests for "another round".)
(exasperated, being helped to his feet by Venuski and Marsovich) On the
(Several of his group chuckle good-naturedly.)
Every time I come to one of these diplomatic parties, sooner or later I
fall down. It's very embarrassing. And it's always so cold! Don't you have any heat on this planet? (he crosses
himself with his arms, rubbing his shoulders briskly).
Cold?! Nieyt! I remember winter in Siberia when I was boy. It
was so cold...
(waving off Marsovich's story she speaks to Terrance) It's Martian
gravity. Mix in a little vwodka and voila', Gatsby!
(Terrance is embarassed. He is bear-hugged by Marsovich.)
Come now comrade! Not to be shy. Is expected to fall to floor as often
as host. Martian tradition...And as you see (a friendly swat on
Terrance's rear-end) you are falling behind.
(Marsovich lets loose a roar of laughter. The others in the group grimace at the pun. Venuski lightly slaps
his arm whereupon he glowers at her. She takes a menacing step toward him. He suddenly laughs and,
drawing his arms far away from his sides, calls loudly while embracing Venuski.)
Vwodka! ... vwodka for everyone!
(Venuski enthusiastically returns Marsovich's embrace while still others fall to the floor to the chant,
Diplomate a diplomat,
It's dignified to fight like dogs and cats,
Top coat and hat bank roll so fat,
We fight for our republic,
Well versed in fact and well rehearsed,
They say, `A compliment to you
And then we stab you in the back!'
Diplomat, a Cheshire cat,
But in the case of war we are first at bat,
We wear many hats, but the media rats,
Declare we are corrupt,
A little bribe here or a favor there,
Will keep the beast of CHAOS in it's lair!
With just a drop of honey,
We secure a place for our money,
From Wall Street to Fleet Street,
To the Tokyo Exchange,
We invest in our world,
We invest in our world,
We invest in our world.
Diplomats, we all are diplomats,
Each and every one of us a foreign guest,
We protect our Earth,
For all we're worth,
Or suffer for misdeeds,
Invest with joy every girl and boy,
And royalties for our children will roll in!
(to near-by scientist) I think I've had enough of this.
Aye! Well, would ye like to go to the movies? My friends and I ahr
goin' to see "Friday the Thirteenth - Part twenty-three" It's in 3-D
hologram ye know.
Yes, thank you. That sounds fun. It's not scary is it? I scare easy.
Why, our husbands will be goin' along and if they kin take it I'm shear you kin too. If you git scared when that 3-D hologram of Jason walks up to ye seat then it'll be me who's hand you kin hold.
Oh, gosh, thanks!
(Terrance bashfully is drawn into the group beginning to leave. Vesta Asteroid secretly
watches the departing scientists from her vantage point behind flowing curtains, she leaves the party,
moments later a messenger reports to Terrance.)
(worried excitement) Dr. Stone! Message for Dr. Terrance
Stone...Sorry to interrupt you, sir, but you must hear this. As the
exploratory space probe, Galileo, was passing Earth's moon, the moon
turned on it's axis and began to move away!
What!?! Oh no!... my fault! I should have been with her instead of here.
Well, I'm sure that if it could have prevented...
... No, no! My Luna... leaving? Say it isn't so... (Terrance grabs the
messenger who shrugs his shoulders, bewildered) Call a meeting
immediately! (he pushes the messenger away) If the moon does not
return within twenty-four hours there will be terrible earthquakes,
destructive storms, tidal waves...
(jovial, drunk) ... And... indefinite postponement of World Series.
(Venuski roughly pushes the laughing Marsovich out of the room and the others worriedly follow.)
No world! Get it? It's joke. What is problem? We are safe here. This is New Vegas - Mars.
Venuski, this is Mars, da?
(Terrance is left alone in the space.)
... terrible earthquakes, (crosses his arms around himself) destructive
storms, (he puts his hand to his head) tidal... oh Luna... (he puts his hand
to his eyes)
(A near-by phone rings, Terrance straightens himself and weaves a bit, holding his head, as he moves to
pick up the receiver.)
Yes, I'm Stone. What! Are you sure? You've rechecked the data? ... and
recalebrated the instruments? ... so somehow the moon was what...
attracted? away from her orbit... by the probe, Galileo? ... (gravely,
dropping the hand-held phone to his side) ... and headed toward...